Wanting to buy stuff but I’m incredibly anxious and…
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Wanting to buy stuff but I’m incredibly anxious and paranoid
I’m a 16 year old trans girl. I‘m not completely closeted, in that I have told some people. For example, told my best friend, technically my immediate family knows (but more than not the vibe is the same as while I thought they might be that sort of christian who is transphobic and conservative), and all throughout the internet I am myself. But in practically every sense from what I ask of people, how I look, etc, no one would know I’m trans.
Now soon I have like a week give or take home alone, and I SO wanna go and get some basic makeup stuff and fem clothes, and have every mind to do so. I can barely remember being this excited before, and I‘ve the money, shops within walking distance, research on what I’m gonna get, but also have a not-so-healthy dose of paranoia and low self esteem.
I live in Australia, so realistically I shouldn’t be so concerned. First trans person I can remember seeing irl was literally in this shopping centre (though of course I cant be certain she definitely was), but I just can’t get it out of my head that I’m gonna have some encounter with someone who sees right through me with what I’m buying and confronts me because of it, or getting obviously stared at for being weird by the people working there, or something like that.
My plan so far is to make some physical list and act as oblivious as I probably will be about what I’m doing so it looks like I’m buying these things for someone else, but does anyone have any suggestions to blend in more, or something to help me overcome my anxiety?
#lifestyle
source
I’m a 16 year old trans girl. I‘m not completely closeted, in that I have told some people. For example, told my best friend, technically my immediate family knows (but more than not the vibe is the same as while I thought they might be that sort of christian who is transphobic and conservative), and all throughout the internet I am myself. But in practically every sense from what I ask of people, how I look, etc, no one would know I’m trans.
Now soon I have like a week give or take home alone, and I SO wanna go and get some basic makeup stuff and fem clothes, and have every mind to do so. I can barely remember being this excited before, and I‘ve the money, shops within walking distance, research on what I’m gonna get, but also have a not-so-healthy dose of paranoia and low self esteem.
I live in Australia, so realistically I shouldn’t be so concerned. First trans person I can remember seeing irl was literally in this shopping centre (though of course I cant be certain she definitely was), but I just can’t get it out of my head that I’m gonna have some encounter with someone who sees right through me with what I’m buying and confronts me because of it, or getting obviously stared at for being weird by the people working there, or something like that.
My plan so far is to make some physical list and act as oblivious as I probably will be about what I’m doing so it looks like I’m buying these things for someone else, but does anyone have any suggestions to blend in more, or something to help me overcome my anxiety?
#lifestyle
source
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