“Yes, Erica. Everything was going perfectly that night. I serenaded her in her dorm room like you recommended, but I didn't count on one of the mariachis tripping, falling on me, and causing me to fall and break the window into another girl's room, Amidst the confusion and the redhead's screams, Erica thought I was serenading her roommate. She broke up with me before the mariachi band finished the last verse of Cielito Lindo.”