Saw the weirdest thing In Goodge Street Tesco last night…
Just popped in for last minutes before it closed and a guy was stealing a few bottles of beer.
When he got confronted when he exited, he pretended to be knocked down by one of the guys working there and started crying assault. He even asked “Siri to call 999” whilst recording the whole thing on his phone.
It was one of the most surreal and pathetic things I have ever seen. Everyone watching was just either perplexed or just telling him to fuck off and stop being pathetic. The guy working at Tesco who “assaulted him”, bless him, was absolutely livid and had to walk away, as he genuinely looked like he would batter him (and honestly I would not blame him).
When no one showed him any sympathy whatsoever, he pulled the race card and recorded he “got assaulted by a black guy”. He scarpered off pretty quickly when half a dozen customers from the shop basically stepped up to him…
I don’t know whether he got into the wrong coke that night or he pulls this stuff off for a living, but it was so strange… #local