Question about Islamic Studies and Vent Sorry it's a bit…
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Question about Islamic Studies and Vent
Sorry it's a bit long but if you read it thank you.
Has anyone done islamic studies? If you did, what is it like? I was thinking of doing it but I just can't be sure. The course (bachelor of Islamic studies) costs like 51k and idk I can pay that much back because i mean my looks isn't the best and finding work that's face to face is not even an option I don't think.
People were driven away before and now I'm just constantly worried whether people are gonna laugh at me or get repulsed, whether I looked good or ok or weird. Even if I do the course, I don't even know if I can get into teaching because of it.
On top of that, everything is secular now, I'm currently living in the west and everything is lgbt. Do the course and then what? If it was still an islamic society, I would've liked to become a faqih i think, i like law. It just feels like we're constantly against what's going on in society, life would be so much easier if i was born in saudi arabia.
In the west i feel like you gotta be a secular person or you just can't do it, I don't know how some muslims like omar suleiman function normally, like how do you care about all this secular politics and that? I couldn't care less about all this stuff.
When I was young i feel like everybody else knew already what was going on and I only realize that now as an adult. When I was young i would just watch cartoons or just play games or whatever because I didn't care about any of this and i still don't. I don't care about trump or kamala, who won the elections, who did what and who got shot, it's irrelevant to me.
I wish I was born as a more practical person that values money, just get straight to work. This passive personality did have it's upsides but work wise or even socially it's absolutely useless. Caring about helping people, being compassionate is useless in the real world. It doesn't make money, if it was just me i wouldn't care but my family is gonna judge and everything.
Even when i go outside I'm always self conscious, there were some cases where people recorded me and now I can't even relax outside without feeling like somebody is always watching. Tried to buy a mask but all of it looks bad.
People usually give the advice that I already know or don't need or want and stay quiet about the stuff I do want or need to hear. Stupid stuff like you need to get a job or you need to get your license, no way sherlock. Didn't know that.
But when they're laughing at you when you do something nobody tells you why, nobody is saying you looked like this or looked like that.
And lastly, I partly want to do islamic studies because it's partly therapeutic. It makes me understand society, what I looked like, the dynamics. But I don't want to dive into a course to see if it would fix me, if I had ok looks sure maybe but even if i do the course this is it. I wasn't meant to succeed. This is what I was destined to be, a misfit, a nobody.
Other muslims already have those connections, I'm doing everything by myself from my room through self-research. I went to the mosque for 6 straight years and not a single soul gave a single proper advice. You just go in, pray, get out. Nobody talks about politics or media or anything.
#religion
source
Sorry it's a bit long but if you read it thank you.
Has anyone done islamic studies? If you did, what is it like? I was thinking of doing it but I just can't be sure. The course (bachelor of Islamic studies) costs like 51k and idk I can pay that much back because i mean my looks isn't the best and finding work that's face to face is not even an option I don't think.
People were driven away before and now I'm just constantly worried whether people are gonna laugh at me or get repulsed, whether I looked good or ok or weird. Even if I do the course, I don't even know if I can get into teaching because of it.
On top of that, everything is secular now, I'm currently living in the west and everything is lgbt. Do the course and then what? If it was still an islamic society, I would've liked to become a faqih i think, i like law. It just feels like we're constantly against what's going on in society, life would be so much easier if i was born in saudi arabia.
In the west i feel like you gotta be a secular person or you just can't do it, I don't know how some muslims like omar suleiman function normally, like how do you care about all this secular politics and that? I couldn't care less about all this stuff.
When I was young i feel like everybody else knew already what was going on and I only realize that now as an adult. When I was young i would just watch cartoons or just play games or whatever because I didn't care about any of this and i still don't. I don't care about trump or kamala, who won the elections, who did what and who got shot, it's irrelevant to me.
I wish I was born as a more practical person that values money, just get straight to work. This passive personality did have it's upsides but work wise or even socially it's absolutely useless. Caring about helping people, being compassionate is useless in the real world. It doesn't make money, if it was just me i wouldn't care but my family is gonna judge and everything.
Even when i go outside I'm always self conscious, there were some cases where people recorded me and now I can't even relax outside without feeling like somebody is always watching. Tried to buy a mask but all of it looks bad.
People usually give the advice that I already know or don't need or want and stay quiet about the stuff I do want or need to hear. Stupid stuff like you need to get a job or you need to get your license, no way sherlock. Didn't know that.
But when they're laughing at you when you do something nobody tells you why, nobody is saying you looked like this or looked like that.
And lastly, I partly want to do islamic studies because it's partly therapeutic. It makes me understand society, what I looked like, the dynamics. But I don't want to dive into a course to see if it would fix me, if I had ok looks sure maybe but even if i do the course this is it. I wasn't meant to succeed. This is what I was destined to be, a misfit, a nobody.
Other muslims already have those connections, I'm doing everything by myself from my room through self-research. I went to the mosque for 6 straight years and not a single soul gave a single proper advice. You just go in, pray, get out. Nobody talks about politics or media or anything.
#religion
source
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