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I just need some help understanding myself
I have many “hobbies” and have a set core of hobbies I genuinely feel like I’d enjoy pursuing over the years it’s evolved and changed but as of right now I have a solid list.
Now I put hobbies in quotes because I never actually do them, I want to, they bring me happiness when I do them but I just can’t do them consistently (ex. I’ve been always taken by the idea to learn how to play the piano since I was 3)
But like if I truly wanted to do these hobbies (I genuinely feel I do) then why can’t I do them? Have I just manipulated myself into believing I want to do them? (One of the core important parts I believe in life is pursuing and engaging in hobbies, I love the idea of dedicating yourself to them) they feel like they are a core part of my identity but I feel like such a Larp for not engaging in them? Do I truly like hobbies or want to do the hobbies I’ve put myself to?
I can genuinely say yes to that question but is that the truth?
I know motivation isn’t what u should wait for, dedication and discipline is the important factor, and I’ve read all the advice, tips, tricks, yadda yadda, I’m at the point of “you gotta just do it dude” but I’ve tried that for so long “just doing it”
I’ve also been diagnosed and recently started medication for adhd and I believe that’ll help me but medication is just a tool in the tool box, what is it that keeps me from truly “just doing it” and “being happy and content”? I always try to analyze myself and it’ll be a tough pill to swallow but are my “dreams and aspirations” just that? Something I “like the idea of” but not actually like the process and doing the thing? (Like the quote, everybody wanna be a bodybuilder, but nobody wants to lift heavy weights)
I don’t want the typical advice of “starting small” “progress over progression” “celebrate small wins” ect ect that’s been written and rewritten over and over again, I just wanna know what is the true reason that I am the way I am because I just don’t understand it, if I like it, want to like it, and enjoy it, why can’t I just do it?
#inspiration
source
I have many “hobbies” and have a set core of hobbies I genuinely feel like I’d enjoy pursuing over the years it’s evolved and changed but as of right now I have a solid list.
Now I put hobbies in quotes because I never actually do them, I want to, they bring me happiness when I do them but I just can’t do them consistently (ex. I’ve been always taken by the idea to learn how to play the piano since I was 3)
But like if I truly wanted to do these hobbies (I genuinely feel I do) then why can’t I do them? Have I just manipulated myself into believing I want to do them? (One of the core important parts I believe in life is pursuing and engaging in hobbies, I love the idea of dedicating yourself to them) they feel like they are a core part of my identity but I feel like such a Larp for not engaging in them? Do I truly like hobbies or want to do the hobbies I’ve put myself to?
I can genuinely say yes to that question but is that the truth?
I know motivation isn’t what u should wait for, dedication and discipline is the important factor, and I’ve read all the advice, tips, tricks, yadda yadda, I’m at the point of “you gotta just do it dude” but I’ve tried that for so long “just doing it”
I’ve also been diagnosed and recently started medication for adhd and I believe that’ll help me but medication is just a tool in the tool box, what is it that keeps me from truly “just doing it” and “being happy and content”? I always try to analyze myself and it’ll be a tough pill to swallow but are my “dreams and aspirations” just that? Something I “like the idea of” but not actually like the process and doing the thing? (Like the quote, everybody wanna be a bodybuilder, but nobody wants to lift heavy weights)
I don’t want the typical advice of “starting small” “progress over progression” “celebrate small wins” ect ect that’s been written and rewritten over and over again, I just wanna know what is the true reason that I am the way I am because I just don’t understand it, if I like it, want to like it, and enjoy it, why can’t I just do it?
#inspiration
source
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