i think i stopped knowing how to just hang out with people…
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i think i stopped knowing how to just hang out with people without making it a whole thing
i noticed this recently and i cant stop thinking about it.
when i was younger hanging out with friends was just like. you show up. you sit around. you talk about nothing. nobody needed a reason.
at some point that stopped happening and i dont really know when.
now every time i want to see someone i feel like i need a justification. like i cant just text someone "hey want to hang out" without it feeling weird or needy or like im imposing. so i wait for a reason. a birthday, a plan, something someone else initiates. and if nothing comes up i just dont see people.
and then months go by.
i was talking to a friend recently who i hadnt seen in like four months and she said she thought i was just really busy. i wasnt busy. i was waiting for a reason to reach out and the reason never came so i just didnt.
i think somewhere along the way i convinced myself that people only want to see me if its convenient for them and that if they wanted to hang out they would say so. which sounds logical in my head but in practice it just means nobody sees each other because everyone is waiting for someone else to go first.
i dont know if this is a social anxiety thing or just something that happens when you get older or if i specifically became weird about it at some point.
does anyone else feel like this? and if you got past it how did you actually do it.
#relationships
source
i noticed this recently and i cant stop thinking about it.
when i was younger hanging out with friends was just like. you show up. you sit around. you talk about nothing. nobody needed a reason.
at some point that stopped happening and i dont really know when.
now every time i want to see someone i feel like i need a justification. like i cant just text someone "hey want to hang out" without it feeling weird or needy or like im imposing. so i wait for a reason. a birthday, a plan, something someone else initiates. and if nothing comes up i just dont see people.
and then months go by.
i was talking to a friend recently who i hadnt seen in like four months and she said she thought i was just really busy. i wasnt busy. i was waiting for a reason to reach out and the reason never came so i just didnt.
i think somewhere along the way i convinced myself that people only want to see me if its convenient for them and that if they wanted to hang out they would say so. which sounds logical in my head but in practice it just means nobody sees each other because everyone is waiting for someone else to go first.
i dont know if this is a social anxiety thing or just something that happens when you get older or if i specifically became weird about it at some point.
does anyone else feel like this? and if you got past it how did you actually do it.
#relationships
source
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