Hello everyone. I’m atheist, and am (or was) pretty anti-organized religion, living in the United States. My family are average to semi religious Christians, and I used to be religious until life happened and I became less religious.
Over the last few years of my life, I’ve felt a true calling to Islam. The Nasheeds I listen to legit at the gym lol. I love the hijabs and the beauty of Islam. Muslims have been very kind, peaceful people to me even with my different religious standing. I also live in a very diverse urban city and can say Muslims of all sort are such wonderful individuals.
Subconsciously, I always stay on Islamic related videos. I even find myself being more open to the idea of religion now that I’ve experienced a lot of hardships in life.
However today has been the “final straw” so to say. I’m not trying to trauma dump, but a loved one of mine passed brutally in an accident and I just found out 2 hours ago. I’m absolutely devastated and have no idea how to react. The first thing I did was cry out for god I’m so serious. Not only do I need comfort regarding the idea of an afterlife and god, but I most importantly want to find purpose in religion.
I’ve done a lot of research on religions and found that something probably does exist. I just don’t know what. But spiritually, I find a calling to Islam the most. I have always felt very touched by the words of the Quran even when I was a harsh critic of religion.
Please, can someone advise me what to do with these opinions and if I should truly convert to Islam? If so, how can I go about this conversion effectively and become a better Muslim?