I’m lost. Everything fell apart after high school and I…
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I’m lost. Everything fell apart after high school and I don’t know how to move forward.
Hi everyone, I’m writing this post because I’m completely lost. (Sorry i used an AI to translate to ENglish).
It’s been two years since I graduated high school. At first, things were perfect. After a traumatizing and exhaustive high school experience, the first semester of college felt like a dream. I was succeeding in every field: I had great relationships and friendships, got my driver’s license, bought my dream gaming PC, was in good health, and got good grades. I finally played the games I’d been wanting to play, my family life was stable, and that first Christmas break was amazing.
During the second semester, things started to slip. It wasn't terrible, but I failed my classes. I took the summer resit exams and failed those, too. I moved into my second year of college while still carrying the weight of those failed first-year exams.
From there, things took a turn for the worse. I started losing my friends one by one. My grades plummeted despite my best efforts. I started dating someone new, only to find out she was cheating on me. My relationship with my family deteriorated rapidly. By the fourth semester, I was spiraling. I stopped talking to my father and essentially "deleted" him from my life, even though I’m still living under his roof.
I’ve been struggling with very dark thoughts (drugs, self-harm, and thoughts of ending it). I found myself questioning why God would let someone suffer for so long without even a moment to catch their breath.
**My current situation:**
* I’ve lost all emotional connection with my friends and family.
* I failed both years of college.
* I’m stuck in a country where the only way out is through money or education.
* I’ve developed severe anxiety, panic attacks, and deep-seated trauma.
I look back at my "younger self" and realize this isn't the life I wanted. I’m lost and I don't know what to do. Help.
(if someone is saying "talk to a porfessional" i just would say that i'm afraid of going to someone i don't know if he is a good person or we just leak my personal information or use them against me)
#inspiration
source
Hi everyone, I’m writing this post because I’m completely lost. (Sorry i used an AI to translate to ENglish).
It’s been two years since I graduated high school. At first, things were perfect. After a traumatizing and exhaustive high school experience, the first semester of college felt like a dream. I was succeeding in every field: I had great relationships and friendships, got my driver’s license, bought my dream gaming PC, was in good health, and got good grades. I finally played the games I’d been wanting to play, my family life was stable, and that first Christmas break was amazing.
During the second semester, things started to slip. It wasn't terrible, but I failed my classes. I took the summer resit exams and failed those, too. I moved into my second year of college while still carrying the weight of those failed first-year exams.
From there, things took a turn for the worse. I started losing my friends one by one. My grades plummeted despite my best efforts. I started dating someone new, only to find out she was cheating on me. My relationship with my family deteriorated rapidly. By the fourth semester, I was spiraling. I stopped talking to my father and essentially "deleted" him from my life, even though I’m still living under his roof.
I’ve been struggling with very dark thoughts (drugs, self-harm, and thoughts of ending it). I found myself questioning why God would let someone suffer for so long without even a moment to catch their breath.
**My current situation:**
* I’ve lost all emotional connection with my friends and family.
* I failed both years of college.
* I’m stuck in a country where the only way out is through money or education.
* I’ve developed severe anxiety, panic attacks, and deep-seated trauma.
I look back at my "younger self" and realize this isn't the life I wanted. I’m lost and I don't know what to do. Help.
(if someone is saying "talk to a porfessional" i just would say that i'm afraid of going to someone i don't know if he is a good person or we just leak my personal information or use them against me)
#inspiration
source
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