Help Me Understand This Social Faux Pas Please help me…
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Help Me Understand This Social Faux Pas
Please help me understand what I did wrong in this social situation. I am an autistic woman f29.
I had a one-on-one walk-in tour of a nonprofit after inquiring about volunteering. The nonprofit focuses on formerly incarcerated and former gang members to provide support and resources. My tour guide was very friendly and open about a lot of his own personal history and making use of these services.
The tour ended at a gift shop. I didn't realize until hours later I was expected to buy an item there but there wasn't anything I wanted. My tour guide was friends with basically everyone at the nonprofit including the guys in the gift shop.
I wanted to thank my tour guide for his time as I was a walk-in and I'm sure he had other work to be doing. Also,I enjoyed the tour and his company.
This is when I did something wrong.
I asked him if I could buy him a snack from the bakery as a thank you. I would have done this basically anywhere else as well so I didn't think it was odd. I know he's probably eaten at that bakery often probably with a discount too.
Everyone actually gasped in shock collectively and froze with their mouths open after I asked to buy my guide a thank you snack.
I was not expecting such a strong reaction.
I don't know what about this was wrong. Was it rude to only offer him a snack and not his friends working in the gift shop in front of them?
My guide did agree after a pause. I assume if there was a rule about this I was breaking he would have declined or his friends in the gift shop would have spoke up.
He seemed fine with me as we getting a cookie but I'm not great with facial expressions or body language so I could have missed discomfort or annoyance. He took the cookie at the counter and left. The cashier didn't seem concerned or confused about me buying him a cookie.
What did I do wrong? I would have done this anywhere else.
#relationships
source
Please help me understand what I did wrong in this social situation. I am an autistic woman f29.
I had a one-on-one walk-in tour of a nonprofit after inquiring about volunteering. The nonprofit focuses on formerly incarcerated and former gang members to provide support and resources. My tour guide was very friendly and open about a lot of his own personal history and making use of these services.
The tour ended at a gift shop. I didn't realize until hours later I was expected to buy an item there but there wasn't anything I wanted. My tour guide was friends with basically everyone at the nonprofit including the guys in the gift shop.
I wanted to thank my tour guide for his time as I was a walk-in and I'm sure he had other work to be doing. Also,I enjoyed the tour and his company.
This is when I did something wrong.
I asked him if I could buy him a snack from the bakery as a thank you. I would have done this basically anywhere else as well so I didn't think it was odd. I know he's probably eaten at that bakery often probably with a discount too.
Everyone actually gasped in shock collectively and froze with their mouths open after I asked to buy my guide a thank you snack.
I was not expecting such a strong reaction.
I don't know what about this was wrong. Was it rude to only offer him a snack and not his friends working in the gift shop in front of them?
My guide did agree after a pause. I assume if there was a rule about this I was breaking he would have declined or his friends in the gift shop would have spoke up.
He seemed fine with me as we getting a cookie but I'm not great with facial expressions or body language so I could have missed discomfort or annoyance. He took the cookie at the counter and left. The cashier didn't seem concerned or confused about me buying him a cookie.
What did I do wrong? I would have done this anywhere else.
#relationships
source
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