First Ramadan as a revert kinda? The reason I don’t know…
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First Ramadan as a revert kinda?
The reason I don’t know whether to fully call myself a Muslim yet is because yes I believe there is only one God that is Allah and Muhammad peace be upon him is his final messenger but I have only read 201 pages of Quran I even struggle to make out how many chapters that is.
I don’t know how to pray but I said to myself if I struggle with fasting one thing I owe to myself is to use this time to learn how to pray. My concerns when it comes to fasting is that I would literally never tell a soul I believe in Islam, that’s hard for some people to grasp but my entire family and friends we literally have never grew up around Islam or known any Muslims it’s quite a foreign idea to us and honestly people would think I’ve lost my mind. Another concern is work because I am a coffee and nicotine junkie I find it extremely hard to have motivation throughout the day without either or the two and I’m sure a lot of people can relate.
I told myself today I will fast for one hour and see how I go well I fasted the whole day until Maghreb which was extremely hard without caffeine or nicotine. I am happy and proud of myself and I wouldn’t have been able to do it without remembering God. I have let myself down as when I broken my fast I went and bought a vape despite me adamantly throwing my vape away last night. I really want to try give up my vape permanently but it is so hard. I am also going to try my absolute hardest to not drink during Ramadan. Don’t really have anyone to talk to so I’d thought I’d share the good news and the bad news here but I am glad I’ve tried but I think I can try harder.
Thanks for reading and I appreciate any advice on these baby steps I’m making I’m so emotional writing this😭
#religion
source
The reason I don’t know whether to fully call myself a Muslim yet is because yes I believe there is only one God that is Allah and Muhammad peace be upon him is his final messenger but I have only read 201 pages of Quran I even struggle to make out how many chapters that is.
I don’t know how to pray but I said to myself if I struggle with fasting one thing I owe to myself is to use this time to learn how to pray. My concerns when it comes to fasting is that I would literally never tell a soul I believe in Islam, that’s hard for some people to grasp but my entire family and friends we literally have never grew up around Islam or known any Muslims it’s quite a foreign idea to us and honestly people would think I’ve lost my mind. Another concern is work because I am a coffee and nicotine junkie I find it extremely hard to have motivation throughout the day without either or the two and I’m sure a lot of people can relate.
I told myself today I will fast for one hour and see how I go well I fasted the whole day until Maghreb which was extremely hard without caffeine or nicotine. I am happy and proud of myself and I wouldn’t have been able to do it without remembering God. I have let myself down as when I broken my fast I went and bought a vape despite me adamantly throwing my vape away last night. I really want to try give up my vape permanently but it is so hard. I am also going to try my absolute hardest to not drink during Ramadan. Don’t really have anyone to talk to so I’d thought I’d share the good news and the bad news here but I am glad I’ve tried but I think I can try harder.
Thanks for reading and I appreciate any advice on these baby steps I’m making I’m so emotional writing this😭
#religion
source
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