how to be a better conversationalist? I feel like I’m…
0 reactions
how to be a better conversationalist?
I feel like I’m stuck in the introductory phase with my friends all the time :’) In fact, I usually run out of topics to talk about with my closest friends faster than I do with strangers/ acquaintances, because I already know most things about them and can’t go about the usual questions. My poor conversation skills have affected my relationships.
I think to start, I have the worst goldfish memory ever, and my mind feels blank half the time. My life is also generally not very eventful, so I feel like a boring person to talk to. I also feel like I self-censor, but it’s subconscious and I feel there’s no way to consciously remove that censoring. I feel most conversations revolve around the other persons most of the time. That is fine for me, but I suppose it feels uncomfortable to be engaged in an ‘interview’ more than a conversation. The times I do chime in with my own experiences, I feel that my inputs aren’t that interesting either.
How do some people never run out of things to talk about? I notice such conversations arise when I’m in a group of at least 2 others, somehow topics can flow smoothly from one to the other. But if I’m talking to people 1 on 1, the conversation feels more start and stop- like we finish one topic, there’s silence, and then someone asks a question and the cycle repeats.
Lastly, I noticed that I can talk to older adults and elderly just fine, and they seem to enjoy the conversations we have. I can just never sustain an interesting talk with peers my age. I’m sorry if this post is messy and there’s probably a few different things being brought up, but I’ve been struggling with this for most my life and I’m not sure what to do about it.
#relationships
source
I feel like I’m stuck in the introductory phase with my friends all the time :’) In fact, I usually run out of topics to talk about with my closest friends faster than I do with strangers/ acquaintances, because I already know most things about them and can’t go about the usual questions. My poor conversation skills have affected my relationships.
I think to start, I have the worst goldfish memory ever, and my mind feels blank half the time. My life is also generally not very eventful, so I feel like a boring person to talk to. I also feel like I self-censor, but it’s subconscious and I feel there’s no way to consciously remove that censoring. I feel most conversations revolve around the other persons most of the time. That is fine for me, but I suppose it feels uncomfortable to be engaged in an ‘interview’ more than a conversation. The times I do chime in with my own experiences, I feel that my inputs aren’t that interesting either.
How do some people never run out of things to talk about? I notice such conversations arise when I’m in a group of at least 2 others, somehow topics can flow smoothly from one to the other. But if I’m talking to people 1 on 1, the conversation feels more start and stop- like we finish one topic, there’s silence, and then someone asks a question and the cycle repeats.
Lastly, I noticed that I can talk to older adults and elderly just fine, and they seem to enjoy the conversations we have. I can just never sustain an interesting talk with peers my age. I’m sorry if this post is messy and there’s probably a few different things being brought up, but I’ve been struggling with this for most my life and I’m not sure what to do about it.
#relationships
source
| 2,000 mlx | |
| 2 | |
| 0 |