welcome my friend, am soooo proud to see you landing here
you have always the right to complain and dont give a shit about people. sincere advice .
keeping silent while accumulating shit, will hurt you and they dont care at all, even if they pretend to .. so yell and speak out .
i've been there too , suicide didnt look like solution so i gave up. not about being ungratefull , i dont want make another mistake more than i did by letting life go so ugly .. glass is not sharp enough 😅
nothing is a waste , nothing is lost , you are here, alive , you make things work and you can do other things .
another escape like your trip to romania , another hobbie , brutal activity , or just break things or someone if necessary lol
you know, failure became a hobbie for me , a vicious fking circle .so ... fk it and live .